Man The Lifeboats

Episcopal Life Online – NEWS

Bishop-Pope Duncan emerges as the leader of a very mixed bag of Anglican nut fudge. One of the new allied leaders apparently didn’t get the memo about always speaking as if from a position of strength; he speaks of being “in a lifeboat” situation and hoping to find a broad enough church to overcome their many and various differences of opinions. Um.

The Southwark Pilgrimage

Some days ago several Anglican wagses
Went on a pub crawl, for to maken pilgimages
To memorialize the Good Bishop of Southwark,
Who once one Yule made merry, very merry, ‘thout shirk.

And they wore costumes, and took pictures, and stopped traffic.

Based on a real incident, with a real bishop, and a real Mercedes full of Christmas toys, and an (unbaptized) bear named Teddy. It’s all highly amusing, at least if your college career included an intensive study of Chaucer in the original Middle English, and you’ve since become a high-church Episcopalian. I’m left with just one niggling question: if a prologue is the part that comes before the main speech, and dialogue is speech between two people, and a monologue is speech by one person…then what’s a “*logue?”

Ship of Fools: Features

The Bishop’s Tale
(or What the Butler Seeth Not)

Prologue

This is a storey tall and quite fantastical
Concerning a man quite ecclesiastical
Of high standing, a pillar of society
But not always known for complete sobriety
The Bishop of Southwark is his name,
And this dear friends is his tale of shame

The Logue

He attendeth a ceremony in Londinium Town
Clad in cassock suplice and gown
Hosted by the embassy Hibernian
The food was plenty and port a-flowing
But before the night yet was old
The guests were cast out into the cold
There was no miracle that night, of whiskey into wine
Notwithstanding the bishop took this for a sign
That further imbibing was what was required
So into the night the prelaat retired
To Londinium Brydge by underground train
Near the Cathederal in Crucifix Lane
To the inn of Shuchard; barred not was he
Where most like he did drink and pee

But lo whilst stepping out to breathe the even air
An Angel of the Lord didst appear
“Fear not” was all he heard before
Hitting his head, hard upon the floor.
For this angel, though not truly bad
Was known to be a bit of a lad
For we are in the noughties
And he a naughty angel be
He thought he would have a little fun
At the expense of God’s holy one
Briefcase and phone just vanished from sight
Leaving his Grace shaking with fright
This brought on a kind of seizure
And, as he later recalled, selective amnesia
(This of course is an oxymoron
but by then the Bishop was too far gone)
For full five minutes there he lay
‘Til he awoke in much dismay

Then guided by a three-pointed star
He came apon a Germanic car
By miracle or some other means
He stole into the back of this machine
Where were stored a multitude of toys
Divers for gyrls and divers for boys
But there was only one plaything he sought
The Sindys and Barbies would count for nought
Oft called Teddy though sometime Rowan
Even to Elvis Presley known
The type of toy common to man
Found in England, Peru and Sudan
An ursa minor of the stuffed kind
‘Twas what he hath need to find
For God had raised him to this high position
So as to undertake a New Commission
To Christen bears and give new name
Before the infidels could do the same
So prevent the bear from being harméd
By calling him after the Prophet Mohammed
All other toys were cast to the ground
Until the little furry one was found
But before he could baptise the wee bear
The car’s alarum pircered the aire
The owner from the inn soon appeared
Not believing his eyes nor ears
Toys on the pavement and toys on the road
And a man and teddy bear praying to the Lord
Thought he veraily performed the will of God
Though drink was in the very sod
For though he was ordained a viker
He behaved more like a bleeding biker
From the car he falleth on his ers
Emitting soto voce a possible curse
I am the Bishop of Southwark this is what I do
Baptising bears in the religion true

Cardinal Saveloy

Swiped with gladness and joy from Ship of Fools, via CartoonChurch.com

*yes, yes, I know it’s derived from the Greek, “logos.” In other words, “word.”

Dana Perino’s Hard Week

I’m listening to Wait, Wait! Don’t Tell Me!, and their celebrity guest is Dana Perino, the White House press secretary. They’ve made her laugh and feel more comfortable, as they know she’s had a tough week.

First, her boss was unwavering in his position, even when it was eroding out from under him like the sands of time at high tide. Someone told him last summer they had “news for him” regarding Iran, and he accepted the news that there was news with gravity, but didn’t actually inquire as to what the new news was. Because he’s not that kind of “need to know” kind of guy, if the news is not actually something he wants to know, right?

So the morning of his big national press conference, the NIE about Iran came out, with the not-very-new-news at all that Iran halted their nuclear weapons program way back in 2003. Our mountain-biking President backpedaled resolutely. His press secretary battled her way through the rest of the week with her arch-nemesis, Helen Thomas.

Even FOX News says the debacle has damaged the credibility (such as it is) of the Administration, although they managed to dig up some grumbling about some rabid anti-Bushites who’ve managed to survive this long in the State Department. Translation: there are still a few people with a sense of right and wrong there.

Oh, and the phone number Bush gave out for the mortgage-relief help line was wrong, and led to the personal phone number of a husband-and-wife ministry team. So not only is the program set up so that only a very small minority of people can benefit from it, but it starts out as a talk-show joke. This announcement was the original reason for the press announcement, I think – it was designed to show how Bush was acting decisively to head off the looming subprime mortgage rate crisis. But oops. Another mess to clean up on Aisle 1600, Dana!

Ms. Perino laughed off her week from Hell with the WWDTM crew, and survived her stint. As the show is taped on Thursdays, she was still in the midst of her battles with the (gleeful, gaffe-maddened) press corps, but managed to sound like a very nice, friendly person for her radio appearance. She declined to use her “White House voice” after noting that her husband asked her not to use it around their own home, though.

Moar Katchup, PLZ!

It’s been a busy couple of weeks here at Chez Gique.

We’re having a cozy night “in” with the fire going, as it’s a cold, blustraceous, snowy day. And later when the fire’s out, we now have a cover for the opening to keep the draft out and the heat in that David made. Eventually, we’ll make it look like more than a sheet of plywood with a handle on it, but it’ll do.

Last night we went to the holiday party for David’s company – a really nice time. It was held at Cantigny Golf and Tennis Club, with no creepy DJ as in former years. Just nice holiday music and good food and conversation. I wore my fringed shawl thing that I got in Maui for my 50th birthday, with dark pants and a dark green cashmere sweater. It made for a pretty festive outfit without being too formal or dressy (or uncomfortable).  Got my hair trimmed a while back, so I presented a fairly tidy appearance.

With the cold weather, Rileycat has become very cuddly and lovey-dovey, especially in the mornings. He’s so funny with his little ways. We toss his little mouse toys up and down the stairs, and he sleeps in his little basket, and he watches out the window at his sworn enemies, dry leaves. And always, he curls up at my side when I sit on the couch or lie awake in bed. He curls up with David, too. He’s our cuddly cat.

Work has been and will be horribly busy. I’m covering for someone else who’s out for the month and it’s been a bit of a learning curve. I think I’ve got things organized now so that I can cope with the extra tasks. It’s hard to do all the new stuff and keep up with my normal stuff, though. It’s a battle to carve out the time to do everything and not be at work after hours. Gradually, I’ve gotten on top of it, and developed ways to cope with the volume, and the different sets of tasks. They’re kind of like strands that have to be kept sorted out and untangled, as they come in by email or phone all at once.

In the evenings, I’ve been relaxing by running around on Second Life, chatting with people, rather than passively watching TV, for the most part. I haven’t even been watching Amazing Race… although I do watch things like Torchwood and NCIS, because they were in progress before I started my SL career.

Speaking of SL, which we weren’t, but we are now, I have two jobs, one of which just started tonight. I’ve had some fun experiences this week – attended a couple of virtual concerts, went to some “dance” events, went shopping for a sword with my pirate girrrrl buddies. And tonight I became a sort of welcome hostess at Lauk’s Nest.  I like it because it’s non-commercial, and non-smarmy.

I had been hanging out, briefly, in a commercial and smarmy place, the sort of place where you can “camp” for  virtual dollars, or dance in a disco waiting for a chance for a money pot to “blow.” The owner of the place seemed to spend all his time in this place, building new things to look at and attract people. I decided to leave the group when it became clear that most of the “residents” of the condos the owner had built were there to hook up with each other, and the owner guy was overseeing it all a little too gleefully. Eccch.

I’m renting a room in a little Irish pub for now – still not 100% certain of THAT sim owner’s set up, he seems a little too taken with all my pirate girrrl buddies when they came over for a visit, but it’s a cheap place to “live” and change clothes.

I like exploring, listening to whatever music people happen to be playing, and talking to newer people and helping them out.

Also, the outfits and hairstyles are fabbleous. 😉

I’ve been keeping an eye on the news, and also keeping busy with choir stuff for Holy Moly. It’s Advent I tomorrow, so big music happening. Christmas Eve service will be at 9pm for me, which is nice as that means I can go to something else earlier in the evening and not have to cut out so early. We’re planning on some fairly ambitious stuff this year, but have some fallback in case any of us get sick (as happened to me at Easter, that was the horrible cough season).

Moar laterz. Sleep naow.