Darn it, I think I missed a really good episode of the Simpsons. I ran across a reference to it in Cathleen Falsani’s religion column in the Sun-Times:

Hey, remember when divorce was a sin? Not just a sin, but the sin. The big, controversial, sexy one. The one everyone was preaching about and arguing over. The one that threatened to destroy morality, culture, and, eventually, humanity as we know it.

I started to ponder the demise of divorce, and the rise of same-sex marriage as the sin du jour as the “parental warning” flashed across my television screen before the opening sequence of “The Simpsons” last Sunday night.

Fox apparently felt the need to let parents know that the ensuing episode would contain some content they might find inappropriate for their children. The episode in question was about fictional Springfield, USA, allowing same-sex marriage as a ploy to attract tourists. Oh, yeah, and Marge Simpson’s sister, Patty Bouvier, comes out as a lesbian.

Upon hearing Patty’s news, Homer said: “Yeah, big surprise . . . Here’s another bomb: I like beer!”

You know, she’s right. Divorce used to be the big bugaboo, the thing that used to be the big scandal, the unpardonable sin. I grew up in a Protestant church and so divorce wasn’t a sermon topic that I recall, but out in the pews, divorce was still somewhat scandalous but considered private. However, divorce of clergy could still get people totally het up and arguing and polarized into armed camps, and could send individual churches into schismatic convulsions. I recall, vaguely, back in the 70’s that “no-fault divorce” seemed to make the ultra-conservative religious types crazy, but I didn’t pay much attention to them at the time. Because back then, ultra-conservative religious types were on the fringe and were considered somewhat kooky and were definitely marginal. Remember?

Ah, the good old days, when the religious kooks didn’t look like they’d be running the roost for years to come.

Later on in the Sun-Times column, a study conducted by a University of Oregon researcher noted that in the mid-60’s, Oregon preachers from both “liberal” and “conservative” churches were pounding the pulpits and warning the faithful against divorce and gambling, and in favor of Sunday closing laws. By the mid-80’s, divorce had become commonplace, gambling had been safely compartmentalized and incorporated in Las Vegas and Atlantic City, and only backwards communities full of hicks still had Sunday closing laws (like Utah? I remember they still had them in the late 70’s at least).

Nowadays, of course, nobody would bother to attack divorce since it’s so widespread, although the occasional fire-and-brimstone preacher might decry it so long as he wasn’t divorced multiple times himself. Many communities are economically dependent on local gambling operations (Indian reservations especially) so most preachers wouldn’t touch the issue. And Sunday closing laws? What? Not even. NO minister would dare attack stores for being open on the Lord’s day when so many of their parishioners work 6 days a week (with part-time jobs) and have to do their main grocery shopping on a Sunday.

There’s just no support for it. Right? But it’s still possible to preach against gay marriage (and against gay clergy) because although a lot of people voice support for their gay friends and family members, they’re just a little bit afraid to rock the boat and REALLY speak out, for fear of causing offense to people who feel differently. On the other hand, the people who feel differently don’t hesitate to speak out against gay marriage and risk causing offense, because they’re so busy being offended by gays that they don’t stop to think how their actions might hurt someone (or worse, result in someone’s death). Or perhaps they don’t think it matters if someone “not like them” is hurt by their words.

I wonder why that is? And how sad. As long as there’s plenty of support for the anti-gay marriage stance, it’ll continue to be a favorite talking point for sermonizing.

Anyway, Cathleen Falsani is now working on a book called “The God Factor” that will have some interesting and provocative things to say about faith – in the words of a number of celebrities who’ve been interviewed by her in connection with a Sun-Times feature of the same name. I’ll look forward to reading it.

The researcher in Oregon, Benton Johnson, has promised to try to revisit the question in 2012 if he’s still alive – what will be the bugaboo issue in the fundy pulpits AFTER gay marriage becomes as much of a commonplace as divorce is now? As he likes to joke, “”I like to kid that when every ninth evangelical pastor’s son or daughter comes out, you’ll hear less on that subject, too.”

Yep, it’ll all come down to that old standby – hearts and minds. The sooner everyone realizes that they’re related to or friends with gay people, the sooner everyone will realize “hey, why can’t my kid marry her girlfriend? They love each other – and God wouldn’t create a love that was wrong.”

As weird as it is to say it, I’m paraphrasing a quote by Mancow Muller there, from the Sun-Times collection of interviews. Strange bedfellows indeed.